Bet

Ooooh this is hard. I don't know how long I could keep up writing a blog in English. It's just so tiring and the words are so complex! Ahahaha!

Well, let's just say I have to give my best shot at it.

It's cool. English is cool. Well, not that expressive but it's cool.

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I remembered my friend Allaine during our highschool years. She was having this itch on her wrist because of her wristwatch.

It had a leather strap and was quite dirty and old.

I saw her scratching her wrists and I looked at her watch.

She then dared me to smell the leather strap of her watch.

"Sige, gagawin ko." I proclaimed.

Then I removed my I.D. cord which was made of some sort of cloth or threaded material that absorbs sweat. It was already blackened and had a sour smell.

I then gave her the cord and said: "Sige, supsupin mo naman ito."

The deal was off.

Sayang, I would've smelled that strap. I admire the scent of vinegar anyway.

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Actually, the point of this post is the story that I once heard from my cousin a long time ago. So long that I had to recreate it based from how I've remembered.



The Old Lady and the Bet

Once, there was this old lady that went to the local bank to deposit her savings. She approached the clerk and asked if she can talk to the manager of the bank. The clerk was baffled on why the old lady would ask for the manager. Nonetheless, she went to the manager's office and informed the manager of her presence.

The old lady was permitted to talk to the manager and she was escorted to the office.

Manager: What can I do for you today ma'am?
Old Lady: I was wondering if I could make a deposit and invest on a business.

The manager was shocked to have heard what the old lady said so he questioned her.

Manager: How much would like to deposit ma'am? And what business would that be?

Old Lady: I would like to deposit my $10M to you. I was wondering if I could trust this bank with that much amount and I would like to invest on a business worth $15M.

The manager was even more shocked when he heard about the old lady's request.

Manager: I would take the responsibility of securing your money and taking care of your business ma'am. But if I may ask, how ever did you attain that large amount of money? Was is your husbands? For an old lady, you have too much money on your hands.

Old Lady: No my dear. It was my own income. I acquired my income through betting.

Manager: Betting? You mean like in a casino?

Old Lady: No. Personal bets.

Manager: Could you explain it further?

Old Lady: Okay. For example. I bet for $2M that your testicles are square.

Manager: That's crazy!!! That is just impossible. I am certain that my balls aren't square.

Old Lady: Are you sure? Wanna bet? For $2M.

Manager: Haha, you sure are persistent ma'am. You're on and it's a sure win for me.

Old Lady: Okay, let's settle this tomorrow morning at 10. I will bring my lawyer with me so he can be our witness.

Manager: That would be fine ma'am.

After the closing the deal, the manager quickly went home, went to his room and spent the entire evening checking his testicles for any sharp corner or any signs that it would be proven square.

The morning after, the old lady and his lawyer met up with the manager.

Old Lady: Are you ready? You can now show me.

The manager quickly removed his pants and showed his balls to the old lady.

Old Lady: Can I touch it? I want to make sure.

Manager: Sure! It's a sure win afterall. Go ahead and touch them.

The old lady then kneeled down, looked closely at the testicle and started touching and checking it.

Old Lady: Okay, that's fine. You win.

Minutes later, the lawyer was whimpering and bumping his head on the walls of the office.

Manager: What's wrong with your lawyer?

Old Lady: Oh nothing. It's just that I won a bet against him for $4M that at 10 AM today, I get to touch the bank manager's testicles.

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Ah, there was also this person who won a $100,000 for winning a bet.

What was the bet?

He had to have breast implants. Sounds easy and fulfilling if that person was a girl. But no, the person was a guy. And imagine that. A guy having boobs.

I'd definitely go for that.

I'd choose that over eating stuff like roaches, pig testicles, and anything that Joe Rogan offers. And I'd definitely pick boobs over jumping from building to building and riding a bicycle through a narrow plank. I'd definitely choose those boobs.

Aside from the $100,000 dollar that he got after the implant, he receives a monthly reward of $10,000 for as long as he keeps it.

What a guy.

And that guy is the same guy that won $15,000 for living in his bathroom for a month. As in literally live in his bathroom for a month.

He's on Wikipedia by the way. Click here.